Just Breathe

On this gorgeous Friday evening I was sitting on my front porch with my dog, enjoying a drink in the sunshine. It’s so quiet. The odd vehicle goes by. Sure it is quieter than town, but as of lately, its eerily serene.

As a true introvert I was completely welcoming of the slow down to prevent large gatherings or shows etc. Where this virus could spread quickly, to flatten the curve. Got my attention but very understandable. Then schools are closed. Closed for 2 weeks following March break. I heard the breaking news over the radio in our office, that literally made me stop. That was my WTF moment. When my heart sank and the uncertainty grew.

I have challenges with the unknown. It’s something that as a very futuristic person can cause major feelings of anxiety.

That is exactly what happened.

It went from large events being cancelled to schools being closed to everyone needs to stay home and only if you are essential can you work. Oh and you cannot see your family and friends as you normally would. Parks are closed. Trails are closed.

What The Actual F?!

This happens in the movies, not in real life. And yet it was. This was, no this is our current life. I have to say current because I know we will all grow from this.

But seriously, this is surreal. As a person, a wife, mother, working mom this ignited a fire of worry and uncertainty of ‘what would happen’. My children were now going to be home for 3 weeks. We work in an essential business that then had to begin asking our customers some serious questions and even denying some people service because of Covid-19 and our need to protect our employees, ourselves, all of our families and the customer as well.

I began having a hard time sleeping. Eating for comfort, half and half it was good for me. My guts this week were in physical pain. I hadn’t taken my vitamins, minerals and omegas in almost a week, simply because we were totally out of routine and my mind was very cluttered. I was disconnected from myself.

Nature is so grounding for me, being outside, especially near water when I am able. After work the sun was shining so bright and warm. My dog and I enjoyed sitting on our front porch. My husband put some chairs on our new deck, that still needs the decking but has plywood, and we were able to enjoy what it will be, listen to the birds from our new space. I needed Friday night in a very big way. To envision what is to come, to appreciate what we already have, how we can shift to enjoy our home and property even more.

Last weekend I felt productive around our house, that first weekend, after school closures were announced on the Thursday, was a complete write off. This weekend I’m stoked for the temps, not so much for the rain, we’ve got lots we can be doing at home for our additions, which just let me say it’s good we started when we did and that we had already received our mortgage advance months ago, because this would have me even more freaked out and I would have justified to myself that we didn’t need to do this… when in reality, sitting on our new covered deck last night enjoying a drink and listening to the birds, this is exactly why we did this. This is exactly why we transformed this house into our custom nest. Love the space you are in, however that looks for you. For us, for me, I pushed past my fear of taking a big leap, we added a big chunk to our mortgage, that I had to push through so much fear and doubt and once the framing was done, it all became so much clearer for me, so much more worth it. In these slightly uncertain times, I love that this home is completely us. Each one of us.

Although we are an essential business and are still operating to a certain extent, has reassured me because we are still able to work, thankfully because we have a mortgage, utilities etc. Being an “essential business” providing plumbing and heating services also means going into peoples homes and businesses… which is slightly nerve wracking. However, I am also comforted though in how the government has really stepped up to provide people with some financial relief for those who need it, with so many businesses closed it’s very real. Even in our small town it’s very real how many are currently shut down BUT those who have also stepped up offering home delivery of their products! It’s truly heart warming seeing everyone pull together, for understanding, gratitude.

I acknowledge how this has affected my own mental health, my children have been incredible at rising up themselves. Our son designed and built, all on his own, a stand for his PS4 wheel and pedals so he can play online more comfortably with friends. He has also been helping decluttering and cleaning. Our daughter has been cooking and baking, and doing some decluttering and cleaning herself. While also making time for her creative mind to explore some of her art projects. They have honestly been a huge help. Especially when my mind has been on our family but also on everyone who I work with, our work family.

Being patient, acknowledging how this is affecting every single one of us. We truly are lucky that the seriousness of this is to stay home to help flatten the curve. We are literally being told to stay home, which yes that in itself being told we cannot do this or that, that is enough itself to wrap your head around. The government is telling us we cannot operate our businesses unless they are essential, our children cannot go to school, they cannot play with their friends in person, we cannot get together with friends or family to celebrate or even just hang out, people who have lost loved ones cannot even have a funeral. This is a time in our lives that is literally making history.

A time in our life that while making history is also forcing every single one of us to get comfortable with our home life, our family and most important ourselves. A time when we need to focus on what we CAN do!

Be kind to yourself and others. This isn’t the time to be greedy or negative, in various ways (hoarding toilet paper, seriously?!). This is the time to take a good look around your home and shift what needs shifting. We have all been given, in a slightly odd way, the gift of time. It can feel challenging to rise up, especially for anyone who has had mental health challenges in their life. If you feel yourself sinking, cause remember everyone is experiencing the effects from Covid-19, but also “life” continues on and for some there has been some more challenges to deal with along with the corona virus. Life itself doesn’t completely stop during a pandemic, my heart goes out to those experiencing even more heart ache at this time. Reach out digitally or on the phone to people, share your heart when needed. We do not have to walk this road alone. What IS within our control?

What helps me during these times?

• Take your supplements to ensure your health (physically and mental) is boosted to the levels that you know help your body feel good!
• Get outside in nature, even if it’s just sitting outside on your own property. Breathe in the fresh air, listen to the birds – they are so happy! Even if just for a few minutes, even of it’s raining.
• Clean up around your property and/or roads nearby. I find the sunshine so motivating and was able to get out after work yesterday to pick up some building and roofing material scraps.
• Diffuse essential oils that are both uplifting and cleansing! This morning I’ve got Tangerine, Grapefruit and Peppermint going in the diffuser. Grounding oils are also very helpful! I intuitively select which oils we will diffuse on a daily basis. All of our oils have physical health properties they support with, but also and perhaps most important during this time, they have emotional uses for every single oil! Tangerine is the oil of spontaneity. Grapefruit is the oil of honoring the body. Peppermint is the oil of a buoyant heart.
• Read. This is something I’ve started doing more of in the past 2 years. Last weekend I got 3 chapters into a new book, Woman on the Edge, perhaps it was resembling how I was feeling. The one morning I woke up at 430am, wide awake, so rather than pick up my phone and get on social, which is far to easy to do, I picked up my book and read the entire thing, before heading to work?! Whaaaat?!
• Journal, however its comfortable for you, on paper, online or both! Share your thoughts, we are all in this together and your words may help encourage someone else or even just free the thoughts from your mind putting paper to pencil.
• Hydrate. Thankfully I love water, however when we are at these in between temps I find myself I do not tend to drink enough water so be conscious of upping your water intake.
• Healthy food, we are all spending much more time at home. Move away from the “comfort convenience foods” and get yourself in the kitchen. Better yet get in the kitchen with your kids! When we fuel our bodies with healthy foods (and drinks) we boost our immune system, sugar is a big immune depressant.
• Claim your space – I’m sure we all have some area in our home we can declutter, organize, purge… renovations aside I know we do!
• Be gentle to yourself and your loved ones. I was initially stressing about how we were going to parent, work and home school and I’ve pulled back realizing that real life can provide so many learning experiences for our kids. Connect with loved ones online or on the phone.
• Follow your intuition. For many this means slowing your brain down first to be able to listen to your heart and soul, truly listen. If you feel the need to clean, clean, if you feel the need to nap, nap. If you think of someone and want to reach out, reach out.
• Meditate and Breathe. This has been significant for shifting my mindset. For pulling myself out of my head and back into my body. If you are new to meditations check out some of my fav’s… Helen Murray, Gabrielle Bernstein, Tamara Arnold, Angela Kontgen. Gabby Bernstein has also created an Anxiety Relief workshop happening on Sunday click here to sign up!

As much as this has drastically changed our life, we all have the opportunity to choose to grow ourselves. This honestly is an incredible opportunity to take a deep dive within. I acknowledge how uneasy this can feel for many. Lean in  keep going and find someone you resonate with to guide you, whomever that may be!