Because I am straight up a recovering people pleaser!
I legit used to put MY health, my needs/wants/desires aside because of someone else, in pretty much every area of my life. What Pam wanted, most times took a back seat and I wouldn’t want to ‘rock the boat’ by speaking up. Or sadly being used in so many ways and being emotionally beat down and afraid to speak up.
Sadly, there are so many people who have been or currently are in those same shoes.
10 years ago there was a significant shift in my life that truly shifted my direction. However I would have to say that it was 7 1/2 years ago, that this journey I would say officially began. I took a step in, quietly. Knowing I would face judgment from others. I continued forward. I wont lie, it was not easy at times, there was a lot of tears from comments or jokes about how I had shifted my own health and also our family’s. Within our lifestyle shift I also valued the importance of nature, personal development, energy work and counseling (hint… everyone needs all of this in their life and holistic tool box). Also valuing the significant time and money spent on myself, something that I am also healing from past relationships.
One thing I learned is that NO ONE should ever base their own health on what someone else simply tells them to do. As a questioner, I always ask why? I’ve had so many people say, you’ll be fine, eat that, or from a doctor telling me to just loose weight, I would sat I am trying and I can’t, something is off… would run “tests”, showing in the normal range so meds stayed as is. I KNEW something was not right. Nature, is who helped me with this!
This summer, after feeling really off for a while and dealing with other varying stressors in my life, I found out in black and white on paper from the Naturopath, the various foods that I should be avoiding. These same foods are which was causing me discomfort, upset and at times major disruption of my physical life and therefore mental health.
After months of knowing that cow’s dairy was causing me discomfort, shifting slightly to try lactose free, I had to continue asking WHY because I didn’t FEEL good. This is however a different not feeling good, than it is to being sick – although the symptoms are similar, which is why I highly encourage everyone to learn and listen to their body.
Even 25 years ago, I remember instances of knowing if I ate or drank something it would not be good for my body, but I did it anyway not wanting to cause disruption or make someone feel bad that I couldn’t eat what they prepared, or sadly being judged, or guilt tripped, made fun of. So… in turn, I made myself feel bad. Typically for days as when I have a flare up after eating something(s) I shouldn’t, it literally takes my body days to get back on track and into rhythm again. Sadly, I didn’t know this back then and I was truthfully living everyday in a “flare up”.
This past summer after hearing the results, I cried – a lot! This meant much of my meal planning as I knew it, was going to be literally turned upside down. It would be next to impossible to eat out at a restaurant and no one would ever want to invite us over.
BUT I DID IT!
I did it for ME!
My family, my husband and kids have been SO supportive. They also went and got tested and interestingly enough we all share some similar ones, which is making meal planning slightly easier.
I did this for me and I continue doing this for me everyday. Because…
I FEEL GOOD!!!
Yup it is NOT easy to eat at someone else’s house and yup pretty much impossible to eat at a restaurant either. I wrote that Ive grown thick skin, but that has nothing to do with it, because I will admit I am healing from fucking years of emotional pain and trauma, much of the reason why I am also a recovering emotional eater, having just healed myself this fall actually.
Read the ingredients, ask the questions, follow YOUR heart and not someone elses words.
WHY AM I SO PASSIONATE ABOUT MY HEALTH?
Because I can finally say… I FEEL GOOD!
Like REALLY, really good!
Also SO DAMN PROUD OF ME for committing to myself, for honoring me and my body and successfully shedding over 70lbs of weight since 2017 and maintaining.
I realized something as my husband and I were chatting last night. Everything truly becomes aligned and in focus when you take a step back from EVERYTHING and EVERYONE else and focus on YOU. If I was completely brutally honest… This past year was hard, really really hard. When I was feeling this way and in this state, it made it much easier for a LOT of shit to come up. That I clearly had not properly dealt with in the past. Some way back over 20 years and some more recent. We had some money set aside that once we were finished everything in the house (from the whole home reno bottom to top, bottom again and then 3 additions), we would pay it back to the mortgage. Bless my husband and his understanding heart, I used a portion of that money we had set aside for ME. Because I knew if I didn’t, I would continue sinking.
NEVER be afraid to invest in YOU. EVER!
I made this decision, about a month and a half after my food test results, I had already begun the shift within our home. I was shifting my “hard” to appreciation that since we were home much more (due to hubby’s multiple surgeries etc) this was time for me to pour into me more and embrace this new lifestyle. It was a VERY easy yes.
Our health isn’t free. This is crucially important to remember. Modern medicine, albeit it is greatly appreciated when needed – is not what we should consider as our “health care”. Truly, it is “sick care”, health care would be the proactive things such as holistic health measures like vitamins, minerals, omega’s – if you cannot get this naturally from the food you grow or buy from the local farmer. This is also meditation, exercise, physiotheraphy, massage, reflexology, reiki, naturopath, chiropractic and so many other modalities… that the government and many benefit plans either do not cover or offer very limited coverage.
I even took it a step further and asked a benefit plan provider why their plan covered essentially unlimited pharmaceutical drugs but only $400 for massages in 12 months – 1 year. They honestly did not have an answer other than they cover the approved drugs and limited alternative services. But if you want to pay how ever much you could add more of those things on…
So I circled back, and asked, I could require multiple prescriptions a month (which I used to) and they wouldn’t bat an eye lash, but for something like massage that would and does help people with back, joint, muscle pain – capped at a benefit of $400 a year.
It’s time for every single person to embrace THEIR health. To really get up close and personal with their body, how it wants to live and be treated. To begin to trust your intuition and determine when the ego needs to take a step back. Aligning with your heart. Your truth.
Currently, living an optimal healthy lifestyle is avoiding somethings I used to consume daily – cows dairy, wheat, peanuts, tomatoes, corn. As well as some others, sulfities, all food colorants, candida, pollens and dust.
Live your healthy lifestyle for you and what your body needs. Honestly it will change your life, I feel so much more confident and empowered in my body. I feel strong and honestly can say I love my body now. After many years of sadly hating it. I love my body, even with the much smaller “c-section shelf” I currently have. It’s a reminder of my journey to being a mom, the growth of that journey, and where we once began. Gratitude and appreciation.